buy me this. please, for my birthday present and i will love u more than anyone else in this world.

*deep, mad in love with polaroid spectra*

a once-upon-a-time story that never been told.

masa saya Form 1 di asrama penuh, ayah saya yang hantar register. jalan bengkang-bengkok tak hengat punya dari KL ke temerloh. mak rasanya tengah mengandung tahap hampir nak meletup. so, she stays at home with my brothers and sisters. lepas sampai, macam biasa lah, bila pendaftaran, mesti kena bayar segala macam yuran yang ada,dengar ceramah pengetua which seems like never gonna ends, kenal dengan kawan yang duduk sebelah menyebelah.

masa tu boleh dikatakan antara masa-masa kritikal family saya. kewangan tak stabil, ayah saya sudah bersara awal atas faktor kesihatan, dan mak cuma berniaga untuk menampung keluarga. memang tak boleh lupa betul those times.

masa bayar yuran, saya dan ayah duduk di belakang seorang student yang kaya tak hengat. bapak dia pun bawa duit bergulung-gulung. semua paid in cash. entah-entah siap suruh cikgu "keep the change" lagi. punya lah bapak kaya. Kami tengok je dari belakang. 

Then its our turn to pay, we have limited cash in hand, so banyak fees have to be cut down and paid later. Nasib baik cikgu masa tu (cikgu saniah) sangat helping and tolong kitaorg sort yuran-yuran tu semua. 

Alhamdulillah. Tu cerita form 1. I made through boarding school. Dah belajar India dah pun sekarang ni. Alhamdulillah. Since form 2 pun i was on scholarship sampai sekarang. Alhamdulillah alhamdulillah. Tapi cerita saya dengan ayah ni saya selalu ingat. Sampai bila bila. 

So this post dedicated to ayah, well i know he wont be reading all this, but selamat hari bapak. And i wish i was your forever awesome daughter that you will be proud of because you are my forever awesome ayah sampai jannah. InsyaAllah. 

working life.

after you study, you definitely gonna go find some work. well, practically saying, work arent as easy as one could think of. but, well, its still depends. who, what and how was the environment are you working with. when it suits you, it feels nice. if its not, then you gonna quit. but thing are not as easy as that. sometimes, you dont have much choice but to only bear with the environment that you dont like.

my brother and i are both working right now. he goes to J.Co Donuts while i stuck here in the Starbucks. during our first week, my brother kindda enjoy his work. the senior employee are so nice to him, the donuts are nice and everything seems so right then. well, for me, honestly speaking, im not really into my job. things have to be learnt fast, some of my senior employee are too scary for me and the job, SUPER TIRING! but now, things are getting better. its a good experience tho to work here. you learn a lot of new stuff, learnt how to be discipline and stick to the rules of you store and all the employee are fun! all these hardness i take as my pre-training for myself before i become a real doctor *mmg poyo macam nak kena sepak je kann?*

i am really clumsy at work. and almost all my manager cant believe that i'll taking medicine and they always said that they doubt me. they even said they wont coming to the hospital i'll be working. hahahahaha.. cant blame them. i also doubt my self. but then, my brother are quitting soon. he said he's not fit into the environment. well, i know just making excuses. he's a guy who cant stick to rules. i mean tight rules. im kindda disappointed with his attitude. but when you arent feel good with your working environment, you wouldnt put your full commitment into the work. same goes with my brother. he come late to work. he always complaint. and now, he's said he is quitting. i cant say more. im sadly too disappointed.

this is just a bit of my pre-working life. just my part time work. not a real job. maybe i wanna hear yours too. just share. :)

of freaks and nerdos.

there's three types of people: 1. normal 2.freaks 3. popular

there's no exact definition of freaks. they just simply some people who dont belong in any popular crowds, they arent so attractive and usually are one of the kind *well you know what i mean*. and these people, because of these reasons are isolated by the crowds, and receive improper treatment like normal and popular people do. i always feel pity to them. they usually end up befriend with people of their kind and make a new FREAK CROWDS.

for guys, freaks included "lelaki lembut". they are frequently isolated from any groups and yeah, they are always alone. i know one guy at my college. *well,you-know-who* u guys can see how his life. even his housemates aren't giving him proper treatment. well, i confirmed that he didnt wish to be born that way anyhow. but, that is he! HIS TRUE SELF!

same goes with my another friend at secondary school. last time, i overheard a guy from my class, a so-called-the-handsome guy, they were talking about her.

bajek hensem guy: kau tau, aku kalau perempuan x cantik malas nak layan. last time, ade S mesej aku tau x. aku ingat awek mana lah yang mesej aku ni. baru nak ayat, aku tanya la sapa ni..? pastu dia reply, saya S. hmmmph, aku nampak je nama dia, terus aku ckp aku bz ader hal nak buat. malas aku layan.

i personally dont think that these world belong to pretty, cool and charming people. we are humans. and we should be treated equally. they have feelings too. and remember guys, KARMA happens. put yourself in their shoe. would you yourself like to be treated the same way..? treat people like how you like people to treat you. :)

001: i gave my number and this is what they wrote for me. :)

bosco:

001 ! Ish ! Ni buat la ni ! Well.. Entahlah how we became close.. But the thing I remember best about you is that you made curry puffs and nasi lemak for me ! And honestly they were great ! You are a very outgoing and outspoken person.. Not shy to voice out your thoughts.. very happening and friendly to all.. Always in smiles and very lively !
P.S. You look great in leggings ! Black leggings !

ah hun:

hehee...nw it is miss 001... oh wat shud i say.... yeah.. at first, i nvr knw there is any tall gal in ktt other than reena and manpreet... bt den, i noticed u wen u joined us during Christmas' caroling... u r such a sporting gal... our frenship getin closer wen u joined badminton gang... evy evening, we wil gila22gether... mmg gila... u hav d talent in bcuming juruhebah... yeah itu dia bola tlekat di jaring... mis u so much.. sumtimes im scared of u 2,.... u r v strong..... bole baling bola... kuat... u r rili strong.. i tabik... smpkan ada yg disuruh spon piza... mmg gila2...... bt sumtimes can get v emosinal too... hehehhe.... hope we can meet agen during KI n gila2 agen... hehehe

haziq:

001, antara budak prmpuan yg plg tggi dkat KTT. tak ingat mcm mana kenal. Kalau tak silap dr captain ball kot. Kalau bcakap memang bsar la suara. Satu KTT boleh dengar. Aktif bsukan. Selalu main bdminton tiap ptg. Xtau bila masa dia ni stdy, asyik tgk dia ni merayau-rayau je. Haha. Ye ke?smart kot. Glad to knw u XD

huzaishysy:

001-err...mau ckp apa ni agar aku x dhentam?hehehe...1st impression,knpa aku dhlg dri masuk kelas kau?bknnya aku mau kacau kau pun.ni mst dpngaruh dgn minah badar tu.p lama2,kau sama mcm bb ja bgi aku.tough outside,tp aku boleh nmpk ah,kdg2 klu drg ni ejek2 kau,kau mcm mnahan airmata ja...social,mcm QiQi.bgi la apa2 kaum dgn kau,boleh bgaul punya

lucy:

001-the most talkative woman..nmpk matang dr sudut penampilan..ambitious dlm melakukan aksi..not bad at all..jd mentor fzik aku time da nk exam..x lokek ilmu..ko tny jek die pape..msti dpt pulangan yg terbaik..sentiasa mkn di kdi mamak..mgkin ad kturunan mamak kot:Dgurau jek...balancing tgi antre study n sport...nice one:D

casto:

001-kebolehan menggantikan speaker d dlm dewan kerana suare yg agak base*..kerkepimpinan..sedikit mata duitan.haha.tp friendly..mudah bergaul..bijak memenuhi ruang..haahaa..petah berbicara..bdn wanita tp berfikiran lelaki pertama pernah ak jumpa..ak rase dy bole pergi jauh..:)

jobot:

001-yang ni asek2 nk mintak aku blanje..cube la skali skale blanje aku lak..tu je..yg laen aku lupe..sori..hahahahahah

mumu:

next special utk miss 001, kenal kat..xyah aa g tau.. sumwhere la.. hehe.. active sukan, pandai, tinggi, suka mnyanyi.. teringat kenangan time BTN, nyanyi kat tandas..hehehe.. suara besar tu, org yg jerit utk alertkan dorm kita time BTN.. nada suara time tu ibarat pelapis Ibrahim pendek.. hehehe.. friendly, mesra, peramah rindu la dgn kau... :D

munie:

001 : first time aku nampak kau, bila lalu class ALL 8 je, first impression: mesra dengan lelaki lebih daripada perempuan. tapi anda sebenarnya unisex. :D sangat suka sports and you are not really afraid to voice out your opinion on anything, & i mean anythingg! haha.Oh, your cooking is one of the best i've ever tasted, kalau boleh, nak upah tolong jadi tukang masak kat college. Quite rajin, and you stand up for your friends, which is one of the things i like. :)

muadz:

001. Em, budak pelik dekat ktt. mula mula aku gelar kakak haziq sebab asyik ajak haziq main captain ball je, and of cos, rajin tegur haziq dekat fb. Oh, ingat lagi the time 001 ni cakap ferrari ada nfs, so we put the car lists of all nfs's series, muehehe. but yea, 001 ni baik, sangat baik sebenarnya. and skema jua :p

thanks for the thoughts tho. love it! :)